It's been quite awhile since I've posted anything to this blog. And I hesitate to now, but I think I will go ahead despite my hesitations. I want to protect privacy, at the same time I want to share this experience with those of you out there who regularly read this, and some who just happen to come across it.
So nearly two months ago, Tasia moved in. Honeymoon phase didn't last too long. Let's be clear, we are using all the skills we can, trying unconditional love, and at times things go well. But other times, not so much. But we knew to expect that. It's just reality is reality! However, we are hanging in there (almost) no matter what. If there is anything we learned from the last adventures in foster-to-adopt, giving up is more painful than NOT giving up!! And it's teaching us all kinds of things about ourselves, like how to pull out strengths we didn't think we had, how to NOT say what we really WANT to say (well, harder for me than Mark.) How to turn the other cheek, (I've found numerous cheeks to turn!) How to forgive far faster than I thought capable.
It's also taught me how resilient kids can be, how they can cope with what seems like insurmountable problems. I'm not going to get specific here, to maintain privacy, but life can be tough for so many children out there.
And though I have to ask myself (and I DO), why they heck are we trying this? I love that story of the man who comes across a boy on the beach, throwing back into the water stranded starfish. The man says to the boy, "Why are you doing this? Don't you see how many starfish there are still stranded? You can't possible make a difference to all of them!" And the boy answers, as he throws yet another starfish into the water, "Well, I made a difference to that one!"
That's our hope. We don't know what will end up happening frankly. She IS 18 after all, and somedays, like to most teenagers, having a permanent family sounds more like a jail sentence (I suspect) than a good idea! So we will see how it goes.
And for any friends and family who are reading this, I just want to tell you thanks for your support. It means a lot. If you have any other friends or family out there who are trying to foster and/or adopt children, let them know how much you care. It's definitely far harder than it looks. Let's hope in the end, it's also far more rewarding!!
